authentic experience

Friday, June 16, 2006

queer dream

We were in another city. I was at some kind of radical community center wating for a presentation. People were sitting together in a room like a living room. I was in a rocking chair, nervous and uncomfortable, obviously new.

A dark woman across the room took off her shirt. She had a lot of tattoos. Clothing optional, she said. I considered taking off my shirt but thought I was nervous enough as it was.

Somehow a sweet young white woman asked if she could touch my breasts. Before I knew it, I was naked, and she was caressing me with all the good-heartedness and warmth imaginable. I was extremely aroused and unsure where this was going.

A man was seated to my right. He would casually touch me sometimes, and I was afraid he would put the moves on me--he made me nervous because my husband had only okayed me being sexual with other women.

As the sweet young white woman touched my breasts, I felt something at my cunt, a wonderful feeling of a hand touching my opening, fingers that might penetrate me, but I was extremely startled because I didn't know who it was and if they were of the approved gender. So I froze then put my ass back on the seat of the rocking chair. I was actually about to fuck the arm-rest, but I didn't know if that would be allowed, not particularly hygenic.

I looked into the eyes of the woman who had been touching me. Can I give you a smootch? I asked. She thought about it, hesitated, and said yes. We kissed slowly and for a long time. I felt alarmed at the intimacy of it. And then we were done--that was as far as we were going at the moment.

I needed to go to the bathroom. As I went to find it, another woman followed me out of the room. She kissed me and embraced me. I was feeling overwhelmed and not attracted to her.

How long has it been? she asked

With a woman? I asked.

Yeah, she said.

Years, I said.

I think we can change that, she said. She kissed me again. She was pushing me, and I didn't like it. I needed to get out.


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